Happy Thanksgiving!
Greetings and Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!
We certainly have much to give God thanks! We began the day with attending church. Afterward, we spent some time at home prepping our part of the food for the celebration with friends.
Xavier was alert during most of his first Thanksgiving feast. There was a lot going on, and he had an adoring fan club touching and petting him throughout most of the afternoon: four girls ages six through twelve hovered around him frequently.
There was disappointment we did not allow any of them to hold Xavier (and some of them were trying hard to broker deals!). Though Xavier is healthy and strong, and we believe not in danger of many of the issues which beset preemies, still Rebecca and I are reluctant to expose him to a lot of handling. We still have the NICU training in our thoughts, and the testimonies and advice of many parents who raised preemies. These parents have many tales of woe from being too free with passing their children around, or exposing them to so many people at one time.
Xavier had more than enough stimulation this afternoon, putting him off his food and his sleep. This led him to grow cranky, and Rebecca and I had to call it a day. We still had a :45 minute drive to get home, and Xavier fussed all the way.
After some time getting him to settle, he ate a full bottle (finally), and went to sleep (eventually).
A Link to Solidarity
Hello to everyone!
A friend or ours sent us a link to a couple whose son was two and a half months premature. The father made a video montage of their son's first year of life, much of it in the NICU.
What a video to watch! Rebecca cried. I, too, found myself growing emotional. Watching it definitely pulled me back to the earliest days of our time in the NICU.
When the off-camera beeps from the monitor sounded, I knew exactly what their warnings were for. The design of towel used to help keep their baby warm was the same patterned towel we used. The shot of the TPN drip bag hit me hard. Seeing the feeding tube taped to his face evoked sympathy. Seeing the CPAP pulled heart strings. The purple sunglasses and the jaundice lamps brought me back to Xavier's first week outside the womb.
I found myself watching intently as the mother sees her son for the first time. He is connected to his CPAP and a dozen or so other wires and gizmos. Two nurses help her carry her son to her chest and then guide her to a chair.
For a while, the mother is focused on not pulling out tubes or some other thing. Then, the reality of holding her son the first time hits her. Tears well up in her eyes! I watched Rebecca respond with similar emotion.
The montage lasts about seven minutes and I encourage you to watch it. The link is here. It, at least to Rebecca and me, gives a more empathetic experience of having a baby in the NICU than still photographs do.
From Giggles To Laughter
Hello, everyone!
Xavier has entered an interesting transition. His smiles with a giggle have started to become smiles with laughter. His expression of elation has grown more complex, seemingly overnight. This development may be related to another trait he has consistently demonstrated this past week.
He has, quite noticeably, started mimicking us, his parents. I noticed this early in the week while he was sitting on my stomach. I bounded him up and down by panting heavily through an open mouth.
Xavier watched me closely (perhaps thinking I was being weird), then opened his mouth and breathed heavy. Coincidence? I had to test it. I repeated the "heavy panting tummy bounce" technique. Xavier giggled at going up and down. When I stopped, he opened his mouth and breathed heavy again. He did not suck air through his open mouth just once, but many times, just as I had done. Still, more data was necessary, so I repeated the experiment several more times, all with the same result. I was a little stunned, but more excited.
The day after, Xavier and I were laying on the bed and I was helping him play with a toy. I was laying on my side, he on his back. After a few minutes, Xavier rolled onto his side. Again, I had to test for coincidence (especially since the rolling onto his side at will is a new skill for him). I rolled him over onto his back and waited. He rolled to his side, and looked at me with a "pleased as punch" grin. He did this several times in a row.
He has demonstrated other mimicking actions he has seen Mom and Dad do. Wow, how scary (and cool!) is that? They grow up quickly!
His developing a more complex laugh, we think, is also a result of learning by observation. We catch him laughing (or trying to, he still can't get it right every time) when we laugh. When we change from laughter to a giggle, he transitions to a giggle with us.
Rebecca and I are now bringing him to the dinner table with us while we eat. He sits in his belly pillow and watches us. We are waiting for him to give us the signs he want to try out "solid" foods. Since he has started mimicking what he observes, he may be very close to tasting something other than formula!
Still one of his favorite toys, Xavier holds his web ball while contemplating something. Perhaps he watches the tiny leaves dropping from the tree outside.
Xavier Michael Takes His First Communion
Hello and greetings to you all.
Yesterday, Xavier was baptised. Today, he took his first communion.
Generally, the baptism is done on a Sunday at the beginning of the liturgy so the one baptised can take their first communion the same day. However, so many people wanted to attend Xavier's baptism, but could not if it were done on Sunday morning. We wanted as many as wanted to attend to come, so we were able to split the events and move the baptism to Saturday.
Xavier's godmother drove down from Fort Collins to present him. There was also a little Russian tradition done just prior to his taking communion. The priest walked Xavier up to the iconostasis and laid him on the floor. Rebecca and I picked him up and handed him to Shana, his godmother, and then he was given his first taste of the cup.
The picking up of Xavier and handing him to his godmother was the first activity Rebecca and I got to participate in. At the baptism, his god parents did all the work. Rebecca helped change clothes and I took pictures. Today, no changing of clothes and no pictures, we got to take part in his first communion.
Xavier was a little taken aback by the taste of something other than formula or plastic toys, but he didn't seem to mind.
Xavier Michael is Baptised
Greetings to everyone.
Today was an exciting day. Amid about fifty people, friends, family and supporters, Xavier Michael was baptized!
Xavier did very well. He cried, quite understandably, after his first dunking in the font. He also grew fussy when the priest struggled to find hair on his head long enough to clip. "Two of these in a row," Fr. Seraphim stated with some comedic frustration while hunting for clippable areas of hair. The baby he baptised the week before also did not have enough hair to snip.
Friends and family came from all over the Front Range, Fort Collins to Colorado Springs! We had a few surprise attendees who blessed us, like a couple we have not seen in years, but saw the baptism announced on Facebook.
Thank you all for your prayers and support. Awesome is our God and Father, Who gave us Jesus Christ, His Son!
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Six Month Checkup
Greetings to everyone.
Today was likely the most challenging for Xavier for this busy week. He woke about 5:30 wanting to eat, though he was not loud about it. He lay in his crib, softly cooing and sucking his fingers.
I got up to feed him, giving Rebecca a much-needed break. After, he and I dialed in to work (I took the day off because of the six month exam and the closing, but thought to use the morning to log a few more hours). As Xavier and I studied the problem I worked on, I turned to him after stepping through the debugger a few times.
"You have a busy day today," I explained. Then I proceeded to tell him what was on the agenda. I did not hide or sugar-coat his doctor visit and his shots and possible blood draw. I told him right after we had to go to a closing which would take a few hours. I then asked him if he thought he could help us out by holding off on any meltdown until after the closing. He cooed his agreement to try. What a trooper! He held to our agreement, and further extended us grace to make an unscheduled stop after the closing.
He held up well in the doctor's office until the shots were given to him. He complained and broke down loudly and with piercing wails, but who can blame him? The two nurses were much better practiced at giving simultaneous shots than the two he had last time. He got five shots today: two in each thigh and one in his left arm.
One of his shots was his RSV shot, a monthly shot he gets the next six months. Another shot was unexpected: a flu shot. Dr. Abbey gave the flu shot in place of the third Hepatitis B, which he will get at 9 months. The flu shot went into his arm.
As expected, Xavier had blood drawn. This was not fun for him. The same two nurses could not find a vein in either arm. They left to find another nurse known for her ability to "get the job done." She did. She came in, held Xavier a little to renew their acquaintance, then immediately found a vein in his left arm. A few minutes later the catheter was inserted and vials of blood collected. Xavier got an Iron Man bandaid to hold the cotton ball in place (his other bandaids were zebra stripes).
During the visit we learned two things we had not heard. Two specialist visited Xavier while in the NICU, one a renal specialist, the other a geneticist. Unbeknownst to us, Xavier had follow-ups scheduled.
The renal doctor found something he "could not explain" on an ultrasound done on Xavier's kidneys (we had no idea this was done). The follow-up is to make sure it is, in fact, nothing of concern. Dr. Abbey wrote us a referral.
The geneticist follow-up is nothing concerning. He found nothing during his initial exam, but he wants to see if there is something to explain the complicated pregnancy, and to verify Xavier's good health.
The number one reason, of course, for Xavier's incredible resiliency and health is all the prayer allowing Father to work wonders, many of which we are still to learn!
We also asked Dr. Abbey several questions about Xavier, handling and crowds. As we have said and we told Dr. Abbey, we are not wanting to raise a Martian (a reference to War of the Worlds), but we don't want to expose Xavier to nasties beyond his ability; we asked for a balance to what we were taught/told in the NICU and advice from other sources and life's necessities. Dr. Abbey smiled. He liked Rebecca's use of the term "balanced." His advice was in line with what Rebecca and I had already concluded and been practicing.
We also learned what to look for in Xavier that will indicate he is ready to start solid foods. We may be a little closer than we thought as he occasionally demonstrates this behavior. In preparation for this, we have some documents Dr. Abbey handed out for us to study.
I've purposefully left the stats for the end.
- Weight
- 9 pounds, 3.2 ounces (4.173 kg)
- Length
- 21.75 inches (55.25 cm)
- Head Circumference
- 15.95 in (40.5 cm)
Always, thank you all for your prayers.
Six Months Old
Hello everyone!
Xavier turns six months old today! We will not be celebrating with cake and ice cream (so far as I know), but still it's exciting.
Yesterday we visited the urologist. Before the appointment, I met Rebecca at the Panera Bread eatery across from Children's. When I walked in, several people were looking at Xavier as he slept in his car set/bucket. One senior lady was commenting on him to Rebecca.
After lunch, we headed over to Children's and checked in. As always, the lead-in to seeing a doctor is to take basic baby vitals. Specifically, weight and temperature. Xavier's weight surprised us, exceeding our expectations by quite a bit. He was weighed with his cloths on, and he was dressed for cool weather, so he weighed in a little more heavy than he truly is.
What did he weigh in at? 9 pounds 9.4 ounces! We'll have the actual "naked" weight this Friday, but nine and a half pounds is still impressive. Rebecca was hoping he might be at eight, and I was hoping for 8 pounds and 3 ounces.
I mentioned to the nurse "He's getting close to the ten pound weight when he will sleep through the night!" (we've been told that ten pounds is a "magic" weight by a couple of people). The nurse looked at me and said, "Good luck with that." (the common response we get when we mention the ten pound magic number).
Afterward, we visited the NICU to drop off Xavier's preemie clothes as a donation. It was odd being back; I had to think hard to remember what floor the NICU was on. We did get to visit with Kathy, one of Xavier's favorite nurses. She was happy to see us, and upon first seeing Xavier was joyfully stunned at how much he has grown and changed.
Rebecca handed Xavier to me then headed to Buckley AFB to shop the commissary. Xavier and I enjoyed a nice traffic-packed drive home, where he decided to melt down (his new nightly habit). After an hour and a half, I got him to settle down and go to sleep (which was his primary issue, he was tired but didn't want to sleep). Rebecca walked in the door just as I was closing the door to the nursery. It was like she planned it that way!
A Whirl-Wind Week Begins
Greetings to everyone.
This week begins a very busy week. So busy, in fact, that it will take at least eight days to get through it.
Xavier has a visit with a urologist. Nothing serious, but mom and dad have some questions. The answers we get may decide whether or not we have him circumcised.
Xavier celebrates turning six months old (out of the womb) this week. Though two months early, still he is developing as though he is a six month old term baby. Thank You, Jesus!
In addition to turning six months, Xavier gets his six month checkup this week. We are looking forward to all the data we've been deprived of these last two months (Babies R Us really needs to have a scale in their store!). Dad is betting Xavier will exceed eight pounds by 3 or 4 ounces, and will be near 22 inches in length. We'll know later this week.
Part of this checkup will also continue Xavier's vaccination regimen. In addition to this, Xavier will get his first RSV shot. This is noteworthy and another blessing to count: our insurance has approved 6 months of this monthly shot. The pediatrician's office was stunned, telling us of their great surprise we were approved for the entire season. They tell us getting the whole season approved is rare. We thank Father for His good hand upon us!
After his checkup, we head south to close on a house. This should be fun, with Xavier still recovering from several pokes and (probably) a blood draw. We have already packed the Infant Ibuprofen and will ask the doctor for the recommended dosage. Foreseeing the "fun", Rebecca has put in a request to the doctor to reschedule should the office get a cancellation this week. They are booked up three months out, but we are hoping for a break.
Xavier will be baptized this week! Usually done on Sunday, special consideration was given to allow the many people who want to attend his baptism to make it. Sundays are difficult for most people, but Saturday allows most of them to attend. Xavier's Aunt Kathy wants it videoed and posted to Youtube so she can see it. We'll see...
Crowning this busy week, Sunday will be Xavier's first communion.
Xavier has started showing more of his independence during the last two weeks. While exciting, it brings with it a new challenge for his parents to deal with: recognizing his emerging demonstrations of will and working with them constructively. Now, it's one more item on our check list:
- Is he hungry?
- Is he in some other kind of discomfort or pain?
- Does his diaper need a change?
- Is he gassy?
- Is he tired (and fighting it, one of his new tricks)?
- Is he too distracted by the noise or activity around him?
- Is he frustrated because he's not getting something "his way"? (probably a more general case of fighting going to sleep)
As mentioned previously, Xavier has discovered his feet: a developmental milestone! He spent a good twenty minutes exploring his legs and feet and toes, most of the time bordering on an angry dislike of something. His ear-piercing screeches of frustration, we realized, were because he could not get his feet (or toes) to do what he wanted. We (working with our new challenge) thought it best to stay out of the argument he was having with his lower extremities. This picture was taken after he resolved whatever problem he was having.
Physical Training
Greetings and hello to everyone.
I was mistaken a few posts back when I mentioned Xavier had seen the last of his current physical therapist. He saw her today, and he will have his final visit with her next week.
Xavier is doing terrific. I was both excited and filled with wonder at hearing Rebecca relate the therapist's thoughts.
The standard rule for preemies is to add the number of weeks they are premature to their term date for developmental milestones. For Xavier, this means adding eight weeks, or two months, to developmental milestones. For example, if a "normal" term baby is expected to roll over (on purpose) at six months, then we should expect Xavier to roll over (on purpose) at eight months.
Well, guess what? I am happy to report Xavier, according to the therapist, is developmentally tracking right at a term baby his age! The "add two months" rule is yet one more rule Xavier has decided not to follow. Glory to God!
He has discovered his feet, and this past weekend his toes. In fact, he has learned how to kick and rub his legs to get his socks to come off so he can see his toes.
He has often liked keeping his feet in the air while laying on his back, but now he is taking this to another level. The moving of his feet to his mouth does more than let him suck on his toes (and giving his fingers a break), it works at strengthening his abdominal muscles. He is also grabbing and holding his feet with his hands. As a note: Xavier has not yet been able to get his toes into his mouth, but he's working on it!
Development of the ab muscles is important to Xavier crawling. He is turning over from his stomach to his back now (though he has not fully mastered this skill). With his abs strengthened, and in combination with turning over from back to stomach (another skill he is working on), soon he will be mobile! I'm going to have to lower the crib's mattress by a notch to keep him contained. Not long after that, we will have to "take an inventory" and install all manner of safety devices around the house and make the house safer for our little man.
He is also learning to sit up. This he needs some help with. He cannot yet sit up on his own, but the therapist showed us how to help him develop other muscles and motor skills. Instead of supporting him by his back, we now sometimes hold him by his hips while he sits in a lap. He has to learn to control not only his head and neck (which he does well when his back is supported), but also his body above his waist. It's like having two swivel points instead of one. Xavier is finding it a little bit of a challenge, mostly I think, because he doesn't know when to expect being supported by his hips; it seems to take him by surprise when his waist starts bending in some random direction.
I have not thanked you all for your prayers in a while. Rebecca and I are always cognitive of Father's good hand upon our son, and we are always cognitive of those whose labor in prayer have helped make Father's goodness alive in Xavier's life.
Xavier developing at the rate of term baby, and not being delayed by being two months premature is one more blessing we can count. Thank you all for your prayers!
A Selfie
Greetings to everyone.
Hollywood has recently adapted the so-called "selfie" as a promotional gimmick.
Grandma decided to take a selfie of herself and Xavier when no one else was around. Unlike most Hollywood selfies, she actually took this one herself. Showing it to us, we thought it was a great picture, so we asked to have a copy of it.
Xavier posses for his first selfie. Grandma is good; she got Xavier to look into the camera even though both of her hands were already in use.
Tummy Exercise
Greetings to everyone.
Xavier had is last visit from his current physical therapist. The therapist decided since we are moving further south than her coverage area, we should wait until we move into the new house for his next session. Xavier will be getting a new therapist at this time.
Xavier was very tired while she was here, and he slept through most of the session. She gave him a deep tissue massage on his neck and shoulders. Since that massage, Xavier has an easier time turning his head to the left.
One of the things we have been working on with Xavier is his shoulder and forearm strength. He generally does not like these exercises. He fusses, cries and throws fits more often than not because it's hard, he sometimes collapses and he does not like being constrained in ways that make him develop new skills.
Many parents, the therapist told us, don't work the "on the tummy" exercises because babies don't like it. They fuss and cry and throw fits because it's hard, they collapse and they don't like being constrained in ways that make them develop new skills.
"But," she told us, "babies eventually learn to crawl anyway. Those babies whose parents protected their baby from some "suffering" don't often have enduring shoulder and forearm strength when they first learn. They go for a while, then fall, smashing their face onto the floor."
Xavier is doing well in his exercises. He is beginning to press up with his arms at times when he is not being "forced to exercise." One of his favored places to practice is his changing table. After a fresh diaper, he likes to do several reps before moving on with the rest of his day.
No, Xavier is not posing for the cover of Babies GQ! He is pressing himself up and holding himself in place. He thinks his "guns" are starting to look totally buff!